TRUMP COUNTERS PUTIN'S NUCLEAR THREAT

In response to Russian President Vladimir Putin's announcement that Russia was perfecting a nuclear-armed missile against which there could be no defense, President Trump announced that the United States had already considered its response.

"I've met with Wayne LaPierre and we agree. The only way to stop a bad guy with a nuke is by giving the good guys nukes. To that end, I have authorized the distribution of our entire nuclear arsenal to our friends in the Ukraine, where my good buddy Paul Manafort assures me that they will be put to good use, as well as to our allies in Saudi Arabia and in Taiwan. What could possibly go wrong?"

US Senator Marco Rubio commented,"Gee, I wish I had thought of that. Maybe we could get a few of those bad boys for my friends in Little Havana."

US Vice President Mike Pence could not be reached for comment. His spokesperson said Pence had traveled to Jerusalem to await the Rapture.

BREAKING NEWS - US ELECTION HACKER REVEALED

US President-elect Donald Trump revealed today that E.T. had hacked the US elections. And yes, the goal was to get Trump elected.

"E.T. is smart," said Trump. "He knew that I was the only President who could keep the world safe from the aliens who President Whitmore first defeated in 1996."

When a reporter suggested that E.T. and Independence Day were works of fiction, Trump was obstinate.

"Vladimir Putin has assured me that Independence Day was a documentary. And he showed me E.T.'s long-form birth certificate," Trump continued. "Who are you going to believe, a West Coast liberal like Spielberg or a patriotic American like Vlad?"

#24 - #FreeSpeechMatters, PUTIN, FAMILY LEAVE

#FreeSpeechMatters
If you don't know what came down at Wesleyan University, look it up. Simply stated, a student wrote a respectful, thoughtful, but politically conservative op-ed in the student newspaper of a notoriously liberal institution. All hell broke loose. He's been castigated for voicing an opinion that differed from the norm, made a pariah.

He hurt peoples' feelings.

We are learning that we have raised a generation of easily bruised youth, protected in their homes and their schools from uncomfortable thoughts and speech. A generation that grew up being praised for simply playing the game rather than for winning. A generation that is having a difficult time in a world that has demands, that punishes failure, that is full of folks in authority who don't give a damn about hurt feelings.

Look up what happened at Wesleyan. Decide who was in the right. Discuss among yourselves.


PUTIN
"My son is 22 years old. If he had not become a Communist at 22, I would have disowned him. If he is still a Communist at 30, I will do it then."

The above quote is generally attributed to Georges Clemenceau upon being 'confronted' with the accusation that his son was a Communist. Whoever the originator, the meaning is clear. In youth, we seek the different, the exotic, the ideal. Age brings wisdom.

There was a time when it was fashionable for American intellectuals to flirt with Soviet-style Communism, a time when the Brits were having trouble keeping their secrets secret because of their intelligentsia's fascination with the East. That dalliance ended for my generation a while back. But Russia has a new pinup boy in Vladimir Putin. My young Progressive friends from around the world are fascinated with the guy.

Folks my age just roll our eyes. Clearly, history teaches us nothing.

FAMILY LEAVE
Congress is scheduled to be in session all of 132 days this year.

Paul Ryan will only accept election as Speaker of the House if he can spend time with his family.

Just 13% of American families have access to paid family leave.

Paul Ryan voted against paid leave for federal employees.

Fuck Paul Ryan.