BIOLUMINESCENT PETUNIAS, MET GALA, MESSI AND MORE: #22

 ODD STUFF

I read. It's silly of me. But I read.

In Rhode Island, it is illegal to wear transparent clothing. So no Met Gala in Rhode Island.

A repeat attempt by the city of Kyle, Texas, to break the world record for the largest gathering of people with one name fell short despite 706 Kyles turning up at a park in that suburb of Austin. The current Guinness record is held by a town in Bosnia that got 2,325 people named Ivan together in 2017. 

And finally, an 81 year-old man has been arrested for busting up windows and windshields in his neighborhood for the past ten years with ball bearings fired from a slingshot. Get off his lawn! 
EDIT: Shortly after his arrest, the gentleman in question died of a heart attack. We'll never know...

BIOLUMINESCENT PETUNIAS

Lede: Scientists from the US, the UK and Russia walk into a bar.

Punch Line: Bioluminescent Petunias.

And there you have it. For a mere 29USD, a garden variety petunia that glows in the dark will be delivered to your door. Spliced genetically with a bioluminescent mushroom, the petunias need no special handling and glow naturally, whether in a light or dark environment. They don't need 'charging'  and they'll glow all night long. That way, you will be constantly reminded that whatever a person can think of, a person can do. And another person will pay for it.

MESSI'S NAPKIN

Speaking of paying for something, a 25 year-old napkin covered with the scribbled terms of a proposed contract with a 13 year-old Lionel Messi sold for just under $1,000,000 recently. There's too much money in the world.

AND FURTHERMORE 

I'm a coward. A visiting friend called the war in Gaza genocide. I said that there were probably war crimes being committed, but not genocide. She said that it was genocide and that perhaps we shouldn't talk about. And in the interest of domestic tranquility, I said, "Okay." 

I'm a coward.

NEWS FLASH

Guilty! Random thoughts:
 
*He'll never go to jail. 
*The Supreme Court will not exonerate him directly. If a lower court vacates the verdict, they simply won't agree to take New York's appeal. If the matter comes before them with the guilty verdict intact, SCOTUS will find a way to return the matter to a sympathetic court that will vacate the verdict, then refuse to take New York's appeal. At some point during the process. Elena's keyboard will burst into flames.
* He will probably be elected President in 2024.
* He will probably not be elected President in 2024.
* The above is not a contradiction. The 2024 election will be such a hot mess that there's no telling who will have won and who lost. 
* Macron is my President.


2 comments:

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